With high gas prices, inflation, supply chain issues, and cancelled flights, most people are happy to put 2022 to bed. We yearn for a better, less frustrating, more prosperous, and healthier 2023. Many adults desire to set goals for the new year. According to polls, 78% of us will make a few New Year’s resolutions. I wonder how many parents work with their children to help them set goals for the new year.
Goal setting is a protective factor for children as it provides clarity, vision, motivation, and a pathway to achievement. When children set goals, it gives them clear steps to follow. It develops a system to achievement, motivation, fulfillment, and accountability. Goal setting teaches time management, preparation and reduces procrastination. Other benefits of goal setting for children are organizational skills, planning, and creative problem solving. When goals are manageable and achievable, success is more likely. Success builds self confidence and self-efficacy creating a “can-do” spirit of achievement. With skills and confidence, children can set more ambitious goals.
Some examples of goals are:
Increased Awareness, Empathy, and Curiosity
I encouraged my children to be aware of their surroundings. I inspired them to look around and see how they might make the world a better place by picking up trash or seeing if anyone needed assistance. I was so proud of them as they developed empathy seeking to help with grocery bags or opening a door for an elderly person. I encouraged them to be curious about others, their gifts, talents, hurts, and passions. I let them know that everyone has a story, and it is their job to learn about one another. Being kind and caring should be a skill that is developed in childhood. This enables young people to develop social skills and be able to interact with people of different cultures, backgrounds, ages, and circumstances.
Increased Discipline and Self-control
According to many sport and life coaches, these two traits engender success in school, work, play, relationships, and life. Character is developed when one can control their temper, manage their emotions, resist temptations, delay gratification, and control their impulses.
Integrity
Integrity means making ethical, respectful decisions, asking questions, and following instructions—even when faced with difficult situations. It is a set of learned beliefs, capacities, attitudes, and skills that create a moral compass children can use to help them understand what is ethical, fair, proper, honest, and true.
Gratitude
Teaching young people to set goals regarding gratitude is essential. Once gratitude takes root, happiness and joy are a result. Being thankful is the opposite of being entitled.
Grit
Increasing grit creates perseverance which is the ability to overcome life’s obstacles and become a creative problem solver. This skill is built by encouraging a positive attitude and turning failure into a learning and growing experience. Dr. Foster Cline, noted child psychiatrist, tells us to let children fail while the stakes are low.
Optimism
Have children increase their vision to a glass half-full rather than half-empty. This helps to mitigate disappointment and encourages children to believe that goodness is all around them even when they have setbacks.
To increase success, utilize the SMART approach. Goals should be Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time sensitive.
Let us make every effort to set New Year’s goals with children and work throughout the year to help them achieve them. If we all did this, it would add to their success and make the world a kinder, gentler place. joneen@myrelationshipcenter.org