It appears that everyone has an opinion about sex education. Activated parents do not want explicit sexual messaging or discussions regarding sexual identity, libertine behaviors, and age-inappropriate content being taught to their children. Government officials, from the educational establishment to health departments, argue that promoting a risk reduction “comprehensive” condom and contraceptive approach is the best approach for the health and well-being of adolescents. There are two pots of funding at stake, a sexual risk avoidance approach to sexual expression which is regarded as the optimal health message, and a so called realistic “kids are going to having sex no matter what you say” risk-reduction approach to sex education.
Colorado is obsessed with sex education passing several “Sex Education Bills” in the General Assembly. The most recent is HB 1032 which states that if a school district teaches sex education, they must teach it the way it is outlined in the Bill. As an example, HB 1032 states: “Schools may not emphasize sexual abstinence as the primary or sole acceptable prevention method available to students.” The bill goes on to forbid any school district to apply for sexual risk avoidance funds or allow any agency that has received federal or state sexual avoidance funds from being in the schools. In addition, HB 1032 goes on to prescribe what the schools can teach and what it cannot perhaps rendering the law in direct conflict with the Colorado State Constitution which grants local control and autonomy to school districts and adherence to community norms. The State Constitution regarding local control should be honored and followed.
There were hundreds of school leaders and parents that fought and even testified against HB 1032, but it was passed and signed by the Governor anyway in 2019. What we have learned is that this kind of government control is rampant across the country. Parents and school boards are at odds with each other and fighting this battle of what to teach to children about sex education.
When the Center for Relationship Education pivoted away from sex education to only teach relationship and life skills training which includes the science of relationship development and maintenance, character and positive youth development and life skills, the floodgates opened, and the approach was embraced throughout the country.
This innovative approach includes skills for:
- Self-regulation and personal power
- Learning about yourself and others
- Learning decision making skills
- Goal setting and overcoming obstacles
- Building protective factors and assets in youth
- Communication skills, including conflict resolution
- Financial Literacy and work force readiness (soft skills)
- Teaching the success sequence for poverty prevention
- Teaching safe dating strategies
- Life skills for avoiding peer pressure and risky behaviors such as underage drinking or illicit drug use.
Let’s stop fighting. When adults are in conflict, children do not get what they need. Everyone agrees that the longing of the human heart throughout all people groups is to be loved well, be accepted, affirmed, respected and included in our collective humanity.
Let’s trade sex education for relationship skills training. joneen@myrelationshipcenter.org