File photo by Glory Weisberg
Julie-Aigner ClarkFile photo by Glory Weisberg
The year 2014 was the saddest we can recall as obituaries kept appearing in The Villager. As noted last week, Walt Imhoff is greatly missed. We also lost Edna Chang Grant, Craig Johnson, Mikke Wolf, Ginger Underwood, Bertha Haugen, Lou Messina, Larry Fanning and my own sister, Margaret.
The Sue Miller Day of Caring filled the DTC Marriott main ballroom with breast cancer survivors, including one male. Each modeled fashionable outfits as their cancer stories were told, emitting supportive clapping. Julie Aigner-Clark was keynote speaker.
Well known local radio personality Murphy Huston was among male breast cancer patients as revealed at the Cancer League Gala last May. Surgery forced him to give up his emceeing duties, and for some guests, quite a shock. Elaine and Sandy Wolf were gala sponsors.
The Denver Health Foundation had its annual NightShine Gala last spring, focusing on the increasing need for adolescent mental health services. Foundation CEO Paula Herzmark said, “That’s where the funds from the gala are going because the number of teen suicides and attempted suicides, depression and even PTSD are on the rise.”
Part of the blame for that can be cyberbullying, as noted at the Smart-Girl Luncheon. Intimidation and ongoing nastiness can have devastating results that can continue on even after a student changes schools, as social media has no date or time constraints.
Archie Manning was a double sell-out for the Jewish Family Service Executive Luncheon.
Originally slated for the Grand Hyatt, downtown, reservations that came in even before invitations went out forced the agency to seek a larger ballroom.
Moved to the Seawell Ballroom in the Denver Center for the Performing Arts complex, reservations soon sold out for that venue, with more than 800 attendees, 600 of them corporate supporters!
The May 21 Mizel Dinner at Wings Over the Rockies was immediately preceded by tornado warnings and two-inches of hail in parts of Denver. Many guests said they were hustled into tornado shelters at the Cherry Creek Shopping Center, but about 2,000 guests made it to the dinner anyway.
Indeed, hail was unprecedented in its affect on the southeast Denver area last year, especially in Centennial in October, with some damaged homes and autos still awaiting final repairs as 2015 began, due to a massive numbers of those areas in its path.
When the audience at a nonprofit benefit is paying three-digits or more per person do they have the right to drown out the emcee, auctioneer and anyone else trying to put on the program? That was the focus on one of the May 22 Etiquette column and it was a hot button for readers as many told us they just didn’t know how to curtail this menace, scared to lose the often loyal donors at one table but unfair to everyone else, too. Perhaps, a note in the event invitation stating something like “please be respectful of other guests at this event who want to focus on the program, unhindered by overly enthusiastic others” would help but if you can come up with a better idea our readers want to hear from you, literally!
Etiquette, this just in
With the “charity circuit” quiet as private holiday parties kept us on the roads throughout the metro area and into ski resorts, I listened to those who, like more than 40 percent of the American public, were divorced. They had common complaints and among them were the thoughtless snippets from those who considered themselves friends of both men and women, thinking the other person would want to be told they were better off now.
Without divulging the names, here’s the gist of what they said.
“I can think of an entire etiquette column on dealing with your ex, his new wife/ her new husband and the charity scene.” With so many of the “regulars” divorcing it’s a very real issue.
“The thing I hate the most is the way people feel the need to ‘announce’ that you’re so much better off without him/her. Oh and then there is the number of times the new beau/date gets told (John or Jane) is so much better with you than the ex.
“The dating divorced person hates being compared to the new person, he/she just wants to stand on his/her own.”
Think how that feels to the new person.
There are so many things that people can do to be a little more respectful of what is usually an already uncomfortable situation.
“People need to understand that not all divorced people want you to hate their ex and it makes it hard to move on with forgiveness with anger around you. Anyway, this is what I have found the most daunting over this holiday season.”
As many friends have agreed, you’re probably facing less stress if one of the divorced parties moves away and California seems to be popular unless they like to ski.
It can take years for a divorced person to get over the anguish and financial fiasco that doesn’t make anyone happier. So before commenting at all on a divorced person’s ex, perhaps just don’t mention it at all, although it is, at least at first, the imagined 800 pound gorilla in the room, restaurant, etc. and as the song from Frozen says, “let it go.”
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