I’ve been on hold for 37 minutes. A less patient person would have hung up by now, but this is important. I wouldn’t have waited this long to order a pizza, not when I could have made one by now. I’ve spent my time pacing and talking back to the recorded message. “If my call …
I’m awakened at 4 a.m. by the guest in the hotel room next to mine. I’m not sure what he’s doing, but if I had to guess, I’d say he’s practicing for a clogging competition. Or hosting one. There’s no way I can sleep now. That’s okay. I’ll get up and work on my column …
I must be getting more philosophical as the years go by. I often find myself standing in the middle of a room overcome by existential questions. Why am I here? What is my purpose? Didn’t I come here for something? What was it? I know a lot of people struggle with these questions and I …
People often ask me how I manage to stay so organized. Actually no one’s ever asked me that and I’m not sure why. Obviously, I’m on top of things, in control. And I owe it all to my two personal assistants. Thanks to them, my life is a perfect testament to efficiency and organization with …
Lucky for me it was the Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop and not a Dress for Success workshop I was attending. If you’re familiar with Erma Bombeck you know that as one of America’s most beloved humor columnists, she would have seen humor where someone else might have seen…well…room for improvement in me. For starters, I …
HUMOR – When you look like your passport photo, it’s time to go home Read More »
In the interest of truth in journalism, I decided it was time to update my column photo. Columnists are notorious for putting this off. I know some who are still using their eighth-grade graduation pictures. I’m not that irresponsible. My last one was my high school graduation picture. But I have a good reason for …
BY DOROTHY ROSBY I dreamt there was an actual three-ring circus going on in my home. At the same time, I had two visitors planning to stay the night and as I led them past the circus and down the hall to our guest room, I wished them a good night’s sleep despite the noise. …
BY DOROTHY ROSBY If you were to see someone—I’m not saying who—jump up from her breakfast and start marching in place in her bathrobe, you might think she’s a few steps short of a full walk. At least you might think that if you don’t have one of those fancy fitness devices. You wouldn’t know …
BY DOROTHY ROSBY Ever since I read that the documents and other memorabilia of my hero Erma Bombeck will soon be displayed at her alma mater, the University of Dayton, I’ve been wondering what will become of my papers when I’m gone. Will they be exhibited in a new climate-controlled wing at my alma mater? …
HUMOR – The collected works of the Ice Cream Kid Read More »
BY DOROTHY ROSBY I read that average Americans check their phones 344 times a day. That’s once every four minutes. If you’re checking your phone every four minutes, all I can say is good for you. At least you can find it. When I got up from my desk this morning, I couldn’t bear …
I would be addicted to my cellphone if I could find It Read More »
